Archive for the ‘Diary of a Wimpy Kiter’ Category

It must be Friday, because I’m feeling particularly pathetic today….

If you’re wondering why I’m the “Wimpy Kiter“, there are a few things you should know about me…an impressive resume, I know.

Day two of my 2-Day Kite Camp started out a little chilly. I bundled myself up like I was headed into the Siberian Tundra, like idiot I am. We met at the MACshack at 10:00 AM and reviewed safety systems. I looked like a polar bear in a sweater, barely able to get my harness around the layers of insulation.

With wet suits, boots, and helmets on, we practiced board starts on the beach, sitting on our butts, power-stroking, and letting the kite lift us to our feet. Chris and I had both worked with trainer kites, so we were familiar with this motion. Chris performed the power-strokes with ease. Grace, not being in my genetic make-up, was severely lacking from my performance, but I managed to successfully pull myself to my feet several times.

Colin, our instructor, then had us begin to run with the kite as we came to our feet. Once we were moving, it was easy to feel how effortless kiteboarding could be! Just you, the wind, kite, board, and a face-full of sand…apparently de-power only works if you actually do it…oops.

The beach began to warm up, and as it did, the afternoon thermals kicked up and the wind grew stronger. I switched from the Cabrinha Vector 12 M to the 9 M, much more comfortable in decent winds for a pile of skin and bones like me. (more…)

i’m not exactly the cool kid…

If you’re just tuning in, you should get to know me a little better before we continue, I’m not exactly destined to be a pro-kiteboarder….

So, I quickly discovered that Kiteboarders have very selective memories…despite the sand in my teeth and other places that we won’t go into detail on, I was off to complete a 2-Day Kite Camp!

By now you know the odds weren’t exactly in my favor…the Michael Phelps of Kiteboarding, I am not.

We met about 15 minutes north of the Board Sports Center at MACkite’s school location on Pere Marquette Beach in Muskegon, Michigan. I rolled into the camp like a boss–nothing says future-of-kiteboarding like a 1995 Ford Escort Station Wagon…(like I said, the deck isn’t exactly stacked in my favor). I am seriously lacking the cool-factor gene that every other MACkite employee seems to have been endowed with. I got my scrawny butt out of the car and prepared for the worst. (more…)

If you missed my post last week, you may want to allow me to introduce myself.

Hopefully, you’re starting to get a small idea of who I am. I’m not exactly God’s gift to kiteboarding.

Now that we understand one another better, let me continue…

Flying a trainer kite was helping! I may have even gained some muscle mass….maybe. There are a few things that everyone “mysteriously forgets” to tell you when you start kiteboarding:

  1. The duration that sand will remain in your mouth after a good fall–FOR-EV-ERRRRR! I took a digger flying the HQ Hydra 300 in some higher winds and came up with a sandpaper smile that could have smoothed out an entire hardwood floor. I found sand in my teeth while chewing a piece of gum, three days later!  Of course, there’s nothing more attractive on a date than a girl with a sandpaper smile…. (more…)

There’s something you should know about me…

I’m a big sally. A baby. A newb. A wimpy kiter.

I weigh in at a whopping 125 lbs of pure pathetic.

What I’m trying to say is this: I’m not the body builder, the fitness expert, or a 200 lb guy. I’m a 5’7″, 125 lb, 23 year old female. I have the physical strength of a bucket of kittens. Don’t tell me you’re worried about your weight, age, or physical prowess…I strike out in all three categories.

Its time you learn to kiteboard. No more excuses, I’ve got enough for all of us. (more…)